Bian Kee, celebrating the birthday of a person after death. According to tradition, it is considered a must have ritual to remember this day for 3 consecutive years after one's passing. Today is my Papa's 3rd Bian Kee since his passing on 24 October 2011. We have been 'celebrating' this ocassion with offering of various foods and prayers on 18th day of eleventh lunar month [that was his birthday].
On this day's prayers certain food is a must have to be offered:
1. The steamed buns must be in blue colour for a male and yellow for a female.
2. Birthday noodles or mee sua
3. Red eggs
4. A cake
5. No candles or joss papers to be burnt
6. Any choice of the various food that are served on birthdays [not those offered during death anniversaries]
This would be the last time we have to 'celebrate' and offer prayers on this day as it is already a third one after his passing. Of course, different families celebrate this day according to their own preference but basically it is in such a manner. It's like celebrating one's birthday without the presence of the person. Some don't even bother to do this as they believe, there is nothing left after one's passing. But to us, we are taking it as an occassion or opportunity to remember our loved one who has passed on and for the living [family members] to gather.
Usually on such occasions, we will ask if he is happy with all the offerings but on this day, I tried many times throwing the coins and never did get a head and tail side of the coins that signifies that he is pleased. I sensed sometime could be wrong but just didn't know what could be wrong. Never did we expect that perhaps he knows that we will lose a relative soon that was his youngest son, my youngest brother, Roddy just 5 days after this Bian Kee. I think he must be very sad too, yet couldn't help it.