RODDY'S THE THIRD BIAN KEE

It seems so recent that my youngest brother, Roddy left us yet it is already over 2 years that he was not around anymore.

Today, 19th day of the 12 month of the lunar calendar is his 'birthday' that is if he is still in this world.  But, in the netherworld, this day is known as 'Bian Kee'.  A day where the family holds a praying session with all the goodies deem fit for birthday celebrations without the person concerned.  This is the third time and the last we have this kind of prayers to mark his 'birthday'.  

No one would like to celebrate this kind of 'birthday' which means the person is no longer around in this world.  The feeling and mood are not the same.  We cannot see if he is  enjoying, happy or not and can only ask if he is alright in that world with the throwing of 2 coins.  A head and tail would signify 'okay', both heads or tails would mean otherwise.

CHENG BENG 2015 [CHINESE ALL SOULS DAY]

Again is Chinese All Souls Day [Cheng Beng in Hokkien] today [5/4/15].  Before today, the family had visited the older graves of our ancestors a week ahead.  Today, the family went to Relau Sepuluh Kongsi Cemetery to offer prayers to our most recent departed loved ones.  My Papa and youngest brother.  Papa passed away on 24 October 2011 and Roddy passed away on 25/12/13.  It a great blow to our family loosing 2 great gentlemen of the family within 2 years.  We missed them so much.

This year, I didn't take many photos but instead video taped this occasion. 

Here are the videos of the family offering prayers to my Papa and Roddy.

AT PAPA'S GRAVE YARD

AT RODDY'S GRAVE YARD

REST IN PEACE

PAPA & RODDY

MISSED YOU VERY MUCH

Roddy Lay Keong's 2nd Bian Kee

Today is the second time that the family offered prayers to my late brother, Lay Keong on his 'birthday' after his passing on 25th December 2013.  He passed away a month before his birthday in 2013, so this is the second birthday [Bian Kee] which falls on 19th day of the 12th lunar calendar.

On this day, most of the prayer items offered are quite similar to food prepared for birthday celebrations such as Lam Mee, red eggs, cakes, fried chicken and meat rolls, fruits etc.  We even offered Sushi rolls and Chinese New Year cookies cos' his birthday falls near to Chinese New Year.  

For Bian Kee prayers, the Mi Koo is blue in colour for the male deceased and yellow if the deceased was a female.  There is no burning of joss papers for Bian Kee prayers.

Prayers were held from 9 am till before noon.  Although, it is a 'birthday' but it is a totally different occasion and atmosphere of a normal birthday.  It is a sad occasion for the family and nothing that we look forward too.

To my dear late brother Lay Keong, although it is more than a year since your passing, we sadly missed you.  You are always in our minds.   Words cannot express our feelings of loss and sadness.  Without you, our lives have changed too. 

LOVE YOU ALWAYS

REST IN PEACE

First Anniversary [Twee Ni] and Third Year Prayers - Roddy Ong Lay Keong

Seems so recent that we lost our dear brother Lay Keong on Christmas morning 2013 with a word of Goodbye, yet it is already a year since that fateful day.  Why, why, why is it so?  Some say fate and some say destiny. Nevertheless, it is very hard to accept the fact that he was gone forever and we are never able to see and communicate with him.
Dear brother 'Chiang' the way we used to address him, we missed you so much that every thought of you wet our eyes and choked our throats.

Today is already the first anniversary according to the Chinese lunar calendar month [should be 23/11/14 but since it is a leap year it is held today 23/10/14].  

Sad and Happy Day.  Sad that you had left us forever, nowhere to be seen in this world.  Happy that your soul will be interned in the family's ancestral tablet at the family house today.  We can only look at the tablet and know that your soul is now home together with our ancestors in the house at the ancestral altar.  We don't want you to be 'wandering' around.  We wished to be home, safe and sound eventhough it is just your spirit.

Remembered that you were still around when the family held the same occasion for our dear Papa 3 years ago.

Your loved ones have prepared an array of food and other items as offerings to mark this ocassion.  May your souls rest in peace forever.  This much we can do for you but the loss is even more to all of us.

We also had a 3rd year prayer ceremony with a change of offerings after the Twee Ni [1st Anniversary] prayers.

DEEPLY MISSED AND LOVED FOREVER

DEAR BROTHER LAY KEONG
REST IN PEACE AND
HOPE THAT YOU SHALL SOON BE REINCARNATED AND HAVE A GOOD NEXT LIFE

Congratulations to Ee Hung

One good news since Christmas 2013.  To my late brother, Roddy Lay Keong, your daughter has not disappoint you.  She has scored all As in her SPM examination.  I think you would know this in Heaven and must smiling all this while.  I remembered whenever she comes up top in her studies you will ring me to tell me the good news.  We are all very proud of her achievements and happy with her results.  Of course, we are sad at the same time that you are no longer around to enjoy this happy moment that you have been looking forward to all these years.  Here is Ee Hung's message in the papers to you and her results.

My dear brother, be rest assured that my hubby and myself as her god parents will undertake to look into her study needs on your behalf.   We will ensure that she has all our support in whatever ways we can for her in this aspect.  We will also assist in whatever we can to look after your youngest daughter and wife.  I know you would like us to do the best for them like what you would do.  We know it isn't the same but we will do our best.

CONGRATULATIONS TO EE HUNG

Roddy Lay Keong's Grave [Siah Thor]

Time flies, Roddy left us nearing to 3 months since Christmas 2013.  Today, construction of his tombstone and grave is fully completed.  A praying service is held today with the guidance of a Feng Shui master to mark the completion of my late brother's 'new home'.

The family members comprising of his wife, daughters, mother, brothers and sisters, mother in-law, sisters in-law and nephews attended the ceremony.  Even his classmates and friends also turned up to witness the ceremony and offered prayers to him.

Although we miss him and still grieving the loss of our departed loved one, we are happy that we have done all that we can for him.  May he rest in peace while the good memories of him remain with us forever and ever.

More photos of the prayer service

Burning of Paper Money and his Clothings

His friends Paying Respect